What's Confidence Gotta Do With It?

“Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.”

– E.E. Cummings

It's not always easy to be confident in yourself, particularly if you're naturally self-critical, or if other people put you down. My peers in my younger days would NEVER describe me as a self-confident person, the truth is; my self-confidence GREW a lot over the years! So what confidence gotta do with it? The outcomes of high self-confidence are generally agreed upon by researchers. Self -confidence and by extension high self-esteem is associated with better health, better social lives, healthy coping, and mental well-being -(Source: Mann, Hosman, Schaalma, & de Vries, 2004).

So what's the life hack? How can you increase your self-confidence?

Here's what I did! These are my top three tips for increasing and maintaining your self-confidence!

Tip 1: Build Confident Habits!

To build a strong sense of self-esteem, and the confidence that develops from it, aim to develop good habits (and to break bad ones). Look after your physical and mental health- regular exercise can improve both. Make sure that you're getting enough sleep and eating properly. Not doing so can lead to feeling bad in yourself, and likely about yourself. I strongly suggest reading self-development books. Being self-aware and ensuring that you are mentally healthy is a KEY way to build self-confidence.

Tip 2. Focus on your achievements.

Your self-confidence can increase when you're able to say, "I can do this, and here's the evidence." As part of your Personal Analysis(remember I spoke about being self-aware), you'll have identified things that you're good at, based on your past achievements and you can also acknowledge "your human" so that you are aware of your weak points as well. Give yourself permission to improve on these things and enjoy the process. Pro tip - List the 10 things you're most proud of in an "achievement log." Perhaps you came top in an important test or exam, played a key role in an important team or project, or did something kind that made a positive difference in someone else's life. See how great you are?! Life is full of challenges and there are times when it's difficult to keep our self-confidence up. Sit down right now and make a list of all the things in your life that you are thankful for, and another list of all the things you are proud of accomplishing.

Tip 3. REALLY BIG TIP! - Stay away from negativity and bring on the positive vibes!

Say it with me; "Your tribe affects your vibe"! If you surround yourself with confident people you will become a more confident person. DO NOT surround yourself with persons who belittle you or your achievements with mean comments. Nor, should YOU be doing this to others! This is the time to really evaluate your inner circle, including friends and family. This is a tough one, but it's time to seriously consider getting away from those individuals who put you down and shred your confidence. Even a temporary break from Debbie Downer can make a huge difference and help you make strides toward more self-confidence.

Be positive, even if you're not feeling it quite yet. Put some positive enthusiasm into your interactions with others and hit the ground running. Stop focusing on the problems in your life and instead begin to focus on solutions and making positive changes.

So read that book, Write that list AND Check your inner circle! A more confident you are just three steps away!